National Toast Day “I like to use ‘I Can’t Believe it’s Not Butter’ on my toast in the morning, because sometimes when I eat breakfast, I like to be incredulous. How was breakfast? Unbelievable.” Demetri Martin

National Tortilla Chip Day “A small pepperoni pizza on a tortilla is healthier than salmon teriyaki with rice and carrots.” Jorge Cruise

National Clam Chowder Day “Life is like a clam, when it opens, you gotta grab the gooey stuff.” Jimmy Fallon

National Pistachio Day “Writing is a closed pistachio shell.” Durga Chew-Bose

National Chili Day “Next to jazz music, there is nothing that lifts the spirit and strengthens the soul more than a good bowl of chili.” Harry James

National Chocolate Souffle Day “You can’t make a souffle rise twice.” Alice Roosevelt Longworth

National Fruit Compote Day “A table, a chair, a bowl of fruit and a violin, what else does a man need to be happy?” Albert Einstein

National Egg McMuffin Day “I still think an Egg McMuffin is the best breakfast.” Judy Sheindlin

National Cold Cuts Day “Before you trade sandwiches, check between the bread.” Cynthia Lewis

National Snack Day “I believe that I was a dog in a past life. That’s the only thing that would explain why I like to snack on Purina Dog Chow.” Dean Koontz

National Marmalade Day “Marmalade in the morning has the same effect on taste buds that a cold shower has on the body.” Jeanine Larmoth

National Frozen Food Day “Make your refrigerator or freezer like a treasure chest.” Lidia Bastianich

National Cereal Day “I’m definitely a morning person. I wake up dead happy, looking forward to having my cereal.” Mico Mirallegro

National Hashbrown Day “Hashbrowns are my favorite breakfast food.” Rachel Bilson

National Crabmeat Day “You cannot teach a crab to walk straight.” Aristophanes

International Lime Day “They say the recipe for Sprite is lemon and lime. I tried to make it at home. There’s more to it than that.” Mitch Hedberg

National Chicken Parm Day “If your mother cooks Italian food, why should you go to a restaurant?” Martin Scorsese

National Baked Scallops Day “Seafood is one of the easiest things to digest—a bratwurst is really hard on the body.” Joey Chestnut

National Coconut Torte Day “I happen to love coconut, particularly for the sweet and crunchy texture it adds to any dish.” Marcus Samuelsson

National Potato Chip Day “Reading a book is like eating one potato chip.” Diane Duane

National Peanut Butter Lover’s Day “Before they had crunchy peanut butter, I would put peanuts in the creamy peanut butter.” Jim Harbaugh

National Artichoke Hearts Day “I have often wondered who was the first person to realize that eating an artichoke was a good idea.” Chris Cosentino

National Corned Beef and Cabbage Day “Corned beef and cabbage—that's our favorite holiday meal when all the O’Hara’s gather around the table.” Kelli O’Hara

National Sloppy Joe Day “My sloppy joe is all sloppy and no joe!” TV Show—King of the Hill

National Poultry Day “People who count their chickens before they are hatched act very wisely because chickens run about so absurdly that it’s impossible to count them accurately.” Oscar Wilde

National Ravioli Day “Pasta is the ultimate comfort food. It’s hot, and its filling.” Laila Ali

National French Bread Day “Did you know the French word for bread is pain?” Erin Healy

National Bavarian Crepes Day “I thought English is a strange language. Now I think French is even more strange. In France, their fish is poisson, there bread is pain, and their pancake is crepe. Pain, Poison and crap. Thats what they have every day.” Xiaolu Guo

National Chips and Dip Day “Miss Manners does not mind explaining the finer points of gracious living, but she feels that anyone without the sense to pick up a potato chip and stuff it in their face should probably not be running around loose on the streets.” Judith Martin

National Cheesesteak Day “I’m a Buffalo wing magnet, a sandwich fanatic, a cheesesteak guy. But I’ll only get cheesesteak in Philadelphia. No one else does it right.” ---Kevin Hart

National Pecan Day “I just clipped 2 articles from a current magazine. One is a diet guaranteed to drop 5 pounds off my body in a weekend. The other is a recipe for a 6-minute pecan pie.” Erma Bombeck

National Spinach Day “The answer isn’t another pill. The answer is spinach.” Bill Maher

National Spanish Paella Day “He tastes of rice with a touch of saffron. He says I taste of seafood. I guess we’d make a good paella.” Chloe Thurlow

National Black Forest Cake Day “My policy on cake is pro having it and pro eating it.” Boris Johnson

National Lemon Chiffon Cake Day “When life gives you lemons. Make a lemon cake.” Karen M. McManus

National Turkey Neck Soup Day “What a marvelous resource soup is for the thrifty cook—it solves the ham-bone and lamb-bone problems, the everlasting Thanksgiving turkey, the extra vegetables.” Julia Child

National Clams on the Half Shell Day “She ate so many clams that her stomach rose and fell with the tides.” Louis Kronenberger

No Foolin' though . . . The library will close at 2 p.m. today. April Fool’s Day “Our wisdom comes from our experience, and our experience comes from our foolishness.” ---Sacha Guitry

No Foolin' the Library will close at 2 pm today. So sorry for any inconvenience.

Children's Book Day “Reading for me is spending time with a friend.” Gary Paulsen

National Burrito Day “A burrito is a sleeping bag for ground beef.” Mitch Hedberg

National Carrot Day “I had to sit down and promise the kids I would no longer have any spray tans. My husband started sending me the carrot emoji.” Mel Giedroyc

National Dandelion Day “Beautiful as a dandelion-blossom golden in the green grass, this life can be.” Edna St. Vincent Millay